I’ve been telling you for weeks it would get here, and now it FINALLY is! It’s March Madness time! For those of you who haven’t filled out brackets yet, you may want to get on that … like right now. Seriously, I’ll wait.
I’ve been teasing it for a couple of weeks, but today means you have to wait no longer for the official drinking game to go with March Madness. If college hoops isn’t your thing, don’t worry, you can still join in on all of the fun, just put a drink in that hand!
March Madness Drinking Game – The Rules
The first rule of the March Madness Drinking Game is you do not talk about the March Madness Drinking Game … no, wait, that’s Fight Club. I’m always getting these two mixed up. But, the one thing to remember is that this is all in fun. Your brackets may get busted, you may keep drinking because someone says “Cinderella” … but, at the end of the day, keep a cold drink in your hand and you’ll have as much fun as the person next to you, and maybe with a little extra cash if you make the right picks!
Okay, let’s start with the basics of this game. Drink (sip or swig your adult beverage) when someone says …
Cinderella * bracket buster * upset * I called that! * no one had this in their bracket * 110 % * clutch * live to play another day * “this is awesome, baby” – applies to Dick Vitale only * “Onions!” – applies to Bill Raftery only
Think this is pretty mild? Don’t worry – we’re just getting started. Take a sip or swig every time a player pounds his chest or someone you’re with asks to see their brackets again (to check if their pick made it through.) I hope you’re thirsty.
Now we’re on to chugging. Chug your beer (or drink of choice – you’re a champ if you’re doing this with liquor!) if …
* Marshall Henderson (Ole Miss) taunts the opposing team, chug two if it’s after a 3-pointer
* Buzz Williams (Marquette) takes off his jacket (the linked twitter account is not the official account for Buzz Williams, but it’s officially one of the more entertaining fake accounts)
* you see a cheerleader crying* chug two if you see a dude in the crowd crying
* a coach gets a technical foul (or T’d up as the locals say)
Not sure what constitutes a Marshal Henderson taunt? Let’s go to the videotape:
Still standing? We’re going to take it up a notch now. Take a shot (shots not your thing? Hmmm … no judgment, but want to reconsider? Okay, well, if not – just finish whatever drink is in front of you no matter how full) when …
* a player hits a deep three and someone says he hit that from “outside the arena” or “(insert local city here)” or “another zip code”
* if a 15 seed beats a 2 or a 14/3 or 13/4 upset happens
* if you lose a Final Four pick in the “second” round – the first full round for the field, not the play-in first four games
* a game ends on a buzzer beater – pretty self-explanatory, but basically if it’s a last second shot that defines the outcome of the game, take a shot – if it’s anything like this New Rochelle buzzer beater, just walk out of the bar b/c you will see nothing better
We all love to receive, but sometimes it’s better to give! Buy a drink for someone who knows the following random trivia (broken down by region for you). Answers are at the bottom of the page.
MIDWEST: If someone can name the most famous alum from Valparaiso, buy them a drink (courtesy of the ExtraMustard blog on SI.com)
WEST: If someone can name the 16th seed in the West without looking, buy them a drink
SOUTH: If someone can name the mascot for South Dakota State, buy them a drink
EAST: If someone can name what conference Montana plays in, buy them a drink
Still in a giving mood? In the spirit of giving, if a 16 seed upsets a 1, buy a round for the bar. Odds are, there a lot of busted brackets if that happens and the drinks will be flowing all night should this upset occur!
I’ve made my picks in my bracket and I’m sure just like every year, I’ll wonder why I spent so many hours watching college hoops if I cannot even predict the outcome of a silly 68-field tournament. But, trust me, whatever hours or effort you put into March Madness this year, it was worth it. My bracket is purely for pride and I have not entered any pools or online challenges. It’s a mixture of the two brackets I make each year, my “reality” bracket and my “hope” bracket.
Notable upsets I have (that fall on the hope side of life) involve Ole Miss defeating Wisconsin. If I can get more Marshall Henderson, I’m taking it. And honestly, I can’t watch much more Badger basketball – it’s just not pretty. I also picked Villanova to not only “upset” North Carolina (if you can call a 9 beating an 8 and upset) but I have them beating Kansas after that. In all likelihood, this isn’t happening but one thing is for sure, Villanova Head Coach Jay Wright looks damn good in a suit. And he’s got six of them lined up for the possibility of going all the way, and this girl is more than prepared to see all six of them. He’s my crush for life. You’ll notice I don’t have my Hoyas winning it all in the posted bracket. This has nothing to do with my not believing they can actually do it – and EVERYTHING to do with my superstitions and thinking that karma will reward me for my humble act. Fingers crossed!
Speaking of Jay Wright looking darn good in a suit …
MIDWEST: The most famous Valparaiso alum (according to ExtraMustard on SI.com) is John Lutz, the writer most known for playing J.D. Lutz (or simply Lutz) on 30 Rock, one of my favorite shows
WEST: The 16th seed in the West Region is Southern University
SOUTH: South Dakota State Jackrabbits (if they say Jacks, buy them the drink)
EAST: Montana competes in the Big Sky Conference